Please Love Me
by Yellowbrie3
Summary: Santana wakes up and doesn't remember much. She finds a beautiful blonde in her bed. Santana and Brittany both have their secrets. But fate has a funny way about things. Some faberry *First Fanfic, chapters will get longer, just getting a feel for everything!* Reviews are appreciated
1. Chapter 1

I rolled over early morning to the feeling of something soft tickling my neck. A rush of panic came over me when I realized I didn't remember anything from the night before. I noticed the blonde locks belonged to a girl who I swear I have never seen before. Who was this woman? Did we sleep together? What the hell did I do last night?

I quickly slip out of my bed, careful not to disturb the sleeping woman in my bed. I rush to find my bed, which is thankfully still in my bag. 8 missed calls and 13 text messages are shown on the screen. The last one reading "SANTANA LOPEZ IF YOU DON'T CALL ME BACK I AM CALLING THE POLICE!" from the lovely Quinn Fabray. That was only sent fifteen minutes ago? What the hell time is it?

"9:30, come back to bed baby" I almost jump out of my skin hearing this woman speak. Her voice is sweet and innocent, but I still don't understand why she's in my bed. "One sec" I say as I quickly rush to the bathroom to call Quinn.

One ring, two rings, finally on the third ring she answers. "Santana! Where the hell have you been? Why don't you answer your phone? How could you leave last night without telling any of us?" Quinn yells through the phone. "Slow down Q, I have a bad headache and it's really early!" "Yeah well you're lucky I didn't show up at your apartment at 7 like I originally wanted too, you can thank Rachel for that." She continues. "Oh yes please thank the hobbit for being so kind as to not send you over here at the crack of dawn to torture me!" The sarcasm was dripping from her every word.

"Seriously San what happened last night?" Quinn proceeds to question, "and who did you go home with?" "I'm not sure Q, I woke up this morning, missing some of my clothes, I don't remember anything and there's a beautiful blonde woman in my head, who is basically waiting for me to come out of the room right now!" Santana says. "Oh Santana! You have to find out her name and who she is right now! Quinn yells again. "Slow down Q and stop yelling I will sort everything out. This isn't the first time I found a woman in my bed and I don't remember the night before." Santana spits back.

"San?" Q asks slowly. "Hmm" Santana says. "You have to go pick up Emma from your mom's house before she freaks out" Santana nods her head slowly realizing that her daughter hates to be away from her for more than 24 hours. Santana quickly pushes the words out "I gotta go Q, we'll talk later, love you" she hangs up quickly and calls her mother, to make sure her daughter is okay. "Mija?! Where the hell have you been? I've been worried sick!" Maria yell to her daughter. "Shh Mama, everything is okay, I'll explain later, how's my baby?" Santana says. "She's fine but she wants you so get here soon! Goodbye!" Maria abruptly hangs up on her daughter. "Shit!" Santana yells.

Emma was her adorable 2 and half year old, they were attached at the hip. Santana only got to go out with her friends once in a while, although her mother loved to babysit the girls really didn't like to spend time apart. Santana really struggled to be alone in her apartment ever since that one fateful night.

Santana realizes her daughter will have a panic attack soon when she realizes she has been away from her mother for too many hours. She has to kick this woman out and she has to do it immediately. She walks out of the bathroom slowly to see this beautiful blonde sitting up in her bed, eyes cast down on her hands that she's wringing slowly. Santana thinks she sees tear tracks on the girl's face but she isn't sure. Santana makes her presence known by slowly clearing her throat, but manages to startle the woman. "I'm sorry, I know you don't remember anything from last night, it was great though and I had a lot of fun, I can leave if you can just call a cab for me" She rushes out quickly. "Woah Woah slow down, you're right I don't remember much, but let's take this one thing at a time." Santana says. "Let's start easy, what's your name?" "Brittany" she says lowly. Santana nods, "that's a very pretty name." She sees a tiny smile appear on her face. "How did we meet?" Santana says. Brittany tenses quickly and springs up from the bed, Santana is shocked and doesn't know what she did wrong. "Brittany, it's okay, I'm not going to judge you." She says. "Yes you will!" Brittany yells.

Santana is confused by this woman's actions; she was smiling one second and the next she basically ducking in the corner and cannot make eye contact with the Latina. Santana slowly walks over to the girl, trying her best not to scare her. "It's okay Britt" she hesitantly rests her hand on the girl's knee and gives it a light squeeze. She's not sure why she's so nice to the woman, Santana Lopez does not let anyone raise their voice to her and get away with it. Brittany raises her head and connects her eyes with the Latina's, Santana notices for the first time how beautiful her eyes really are. "Last night I noticed you when you walked through the front door of _Kitty"s._" Santana's eye's shoot open when she realizes that they went to the strip club last night. Brittany continues "I was on stage and I saw you walk in with some other blonde and another tiny brunette, but I only saw you, I almost fell off the stage." Santana gives her knee another squeeze to encourage her to continue. "After my dance I walked over to you to talk, you were pretty drunk I noticed, but we hit it off right away, I asked you to talk outside." Santana looked down, she never did that, she was a mom, and she rarely went somewhere alone, or outside with a stranger. Brittany noticed the withdrawal of Santana's hand and her stomach dropped. Brittany knew what was coming next so she just spit it out anyway. "I'm a stripper Santana." Brittany looked up to see Santana with horrified eyes, the unshed tears broke through and started to run down her face. She got up quickly and grabbed her small amount of clothing and her bag and flew out the front door.

Santana sat there stunned for a few minutes before she realized that Brittany was gone. She felt horrible, she didn't care what Brittany's job was she just wanted to know what happened last night, and now she will never know. She made the poor girl cry and feel terrible about herself, people most always react that way to her and she was just another Bitch. "I have to go get Emma, I can't worry about this right now" She said out loud. She quickly got dressed and flew out the door. She quickly took out her phone and texted Quinn **I think I slept with a stripper last night. **She locked her phone and took off to her mother's to get her daughter.

First ever fan fic, please be kind! Next chapter we meet, Emma and find out some more about Santana's past. Rated T for now, but will eventually change to M


	2. Chapter 2

Mama! Is yelled loudly through the house of Santana's mother's. A tiny little brunette with the same caramel skin as her mother and big brown eyes comes running at the Latina full force. Santana scoops her daughter up easily and the little Latina grabs her cheeks and kisses her lips. "Mama I missed you sto muck". "Oh mija I missed you so much too!" Santana says as she peppers her face with kisses.

Santana's mother comes into the room and glares at the Latina. "Mija why didn't you call last night? Quinn and Rachel were looking for you and apparently you were nowhere to be found. You gave everyone a scare, you never do anything like this, not since..." Maria trailed off. Santana's eyes grew wide as her mother brought up her past. "Sorry mama I didn't mean for this to happen, I truly don't even remember anything and I probably won't." "What do you mean?" "Never mind I'll explain another time, I wanna take my baby home now and get my cuddle on." Santana says.

"Okay mija, Em give abuela kisses" Maria says. "Bye abbbuela" the little Latina kisses her grandmother's cheeks and gives her a small wave goodbye. Santana kisses her mother and says goodbye as they make their way to the car.

"Mama I hungey" Emma says from the backseat. Santana smiles at her daughter and heads over to the diner so they can get breakfast. It's still early enough and she could really go for some pancakes.

Santana and Emma make their way to the diner that's close to her mother's. She's only been there once or twice. She's starving and her daughter is looking at her with those big brown eyes, she needs to feed her as soon as she can. She pulls into "Mickeys" about five minutes later and the two Latinas make their way to the front to be seated.

The hostess sits Santana and her daughter in a small booth in the corner. "Your waitress will be right with you"' the young blonde says before walking back to her spot in front. Emma tries her best to read the menu and Santana just smiles as she scrunched her little face and her eyebrows furrow like she's thinking really hard. "What do you want to get mija?" She asks. " I want pacakes mama and apps juice" Emma says quietly. Santana's daughter is very shy and when she's in open places she doesn't speak very loud and keeps her eyes cast down. She's trying her best to break this habit, but Santana herself had been through so much she understands her daughter's shy attitude.

The waitress walks over and startles the Latina who holds her hand over her chest to show she was scared. "I'm so sorry I didn't mean to scare you! I just wanted to know if you ladies wanted something to dr..." The waitress stops which causes Santana to look up quickly. "B-Brittany?" She says. Brittany frowns and looks down and starts to wring her hands lightly and shift her weight. Tears are starting to well up in her eyes and she turns to leave. Santana reaches out and grabs her wrist to stop her. Emma is coloring on the paper the hostess have her oblivious to anything. "Please don't leave" the Latina begs, Brittany looks into her eyes and can see the sincerity in her brown orbs. She nods and asks again what they want to drink. Santana orders a coffee and an apple juice for her daughter, she tells her they both want an order of pancakes as well and they'll split it. Brittany writes everything down, and turns to go place the order.

She comes back a few minutes later with the drinks for the ladies. Emma finally looks up at Brittany and she smiles and sends a small wave her way. This surprises Santana because Emma is never friendly to people she doesn't know. Brittany shows the little girl a big smile and waves back. Santana looks up at Brittany and asks if she wants to sit down. She nods and walks over to Mickey to get the food for the ladies and tells him she's taking her break.

Brittany sits in the booth next to Santana and sends her a shy smile. She still hesitates and looks nervous but at least it's something. Emma looks up and says "hi I'm Emma, what's your name?" "Brittany" she says happily. "You have a very pretty name" she says to Emma. "T'anks bwitty". Brittany smiles at her struggle to say her name. She looks over and the Latina is smiling at her daughter as well.

Emma is lost in her own world coloring and putting her imagination to good use. Santana looks towards Brittany as if she is scared to really speak. Brittany slowly reaches down and squeezes the Latina's knew just like Santana did for Brittany this morning. "I'm sorry about how I acted this morning, it wasn't right of me and I wasn't judging you at all, I was just confused considering I don't remember us going to a strip club. I don't even remember leaving the bar to be honest." Santana rushes out. Brittany studies the girl for a few minutes, she knows Santana has more to say. "I'm not a very open person, and I cannot seem to wrap my head around the fact that I would go outside with you by myself and then leave. I haven't been with another person in years, d-did we sleep together b-brittany?" Santana asks and looks up at Brittany. Brittany shakes her head and begins to speak, "I didn't ask you to go home because I wanted to sleep with you, don't get me wrong you are a beautiful woman, but you didn't look at me like everyone else does, we actually held a conversation, you weren't interested in me for my body and to put money in the g-string. You seemed to just want a friend to talk too. I asked you to go outside because it was so hot in the club and I could barely hear you. It was getting super late and I was beginning to get tired. When we got back to your house, you started to cry, I went to hug you in hopes to make you feel better but you shrugged me off and cowered on the bed." Brittany looks at Santana with sad eyes as Santana looks down at her hands tears forming in her eyes. "I tried to get you to change into something comfy, you were laying in the bed and it was very unsuccessful and were sobbing so hard I thought you would have a panic attack. I was in the middle of changing my shirt when I decided to lay down with you instead and we both dozed off to sleep." She finishes and lets out a long breath from talking so much.

Santana is quiet for a few minutes when she hears her daughter "mama is Bwitty coming ova today?" Stunned by her daughter's question Santana looks at Brittany who just shrugs her shoulders as a response indicating she wouldn't mind hanging out for a little bit. "I'll let you ladies finish your breakfast, see you later Santana" she says as she walks away. Santana scoops up her daughter and makes her way to the register to pay, the hostess lets her know that the meal was on the house, but Brittany left her a piece of paper. The Latina smiles as she opens it and notices Brittany left Santana her number to call her later.

Several hours later Emma is down for a nap and Santana is sitting on the couch going over some papers that her students wrote. She stops to get a glass of water when she hears her daughter whimpering through the baby monitor. She rushes into the room and grabs her little girl holding her close. Emma quickly buries her head in her mother's neck as hot tears roll down Santana's neck. Santana hums soothing words to her daughter and gently rubs her back coaxing her out of her sleep. The little latina slowly flutters her eyes open and looks up at her mother as a few stray tears continue to fall. Santana wipes the tears from her daughter's face and asks "what happened mija? Mama's here it's okay." The little girl looks at her mother and pouts her tiny lip, "I-I had a bad dweam mama"she mumbles into her mother's neck. "It's okay baby nothing is going to happen to you, do you want to come finish the rest of your name with mama?" Emma nods while wrapping her smalls arms around her mother's neck and buries her head once more.

Santana walks back into the living with her daughter to put her work away and bring it to her bedroom. The latina lays down and Emma immediately curls into her side and closes her eyes once more. Santana smiles at how adorable her daughter is and hopes that she doesn't get nightmares like Santana has for the past three years. When she used to live with Quinn, Santana would wake up screaming in the middle of the night and beg for Quinn to hold her as she whimpered into her best friends neck. Quinn was so nervous when Santana told her she was moving out with Emma to start their life together. Emma was just seven months old when Santana decided to move out and Rachel was moving in with Quinn. Anytime Quinn asked the latina if she was still having nightmares, she would lie and say that she was fine and she hadn't had one since she moved out. Which was completely false considering she has at least six to seven nightmares a week and three or four panic attacks. It was then that it dawned on her that she probably had one while Brittany was there last night and now she must think she's a crazy person. She decided she needed to text the girl, she did leave her number after all.

"**Hey Brittany, it's Santana. Thanks so much for taking care of breakfast this morning, it was very sweet of you"**

"Hey! You're very welcome it was really no problem at all : )"

"**Thanks again, what are you up too?" **

"Nothing much actually just reading a book"

Santana became really excited about that. Maybe Brittany is a bit of a nerd like Santana and they could talk about books together. Santana was an amazing English teacher maybe they will have something in common.

"**That's great! Did you want to come hangout for a little bit? Emma is napping but she should be up in about a half hour."**

"I would love too, let me just call a cab and I'll be heading over."

Santana frowned at the response. Did Brittany not have a car? She had to take public transportation everywhere? She did ask me to call her a cab this morning before she left like a tornado. She did pay for breakfast so maybe Santana could offer to pick the girl up.

"**Don't be silly I could give you a lift?" **

"No that's okay, I'll be over soon, bye San"

Santana's heart fluttered at the use of the nickname. She was still very confused, she never got this close to people she didn't know. Brittany probably won't stay around very long when she learns the many issues of the Lopez life. That's okay though Santana has gotten used to woman running in the opposite direction when they learn the Latina hasn't had sex in about 3 and a half years and is basically afraid to be touched. Maybe she can just be her friend.

Thoughts? Please review! Brittany is hiding something. How will she react to Santana and her own secrets.


	3. Chapter 3

**Knock, Knock ,Knock**

About 40 minutes later Santana is awoken from her nap by hearing the pounding on the front door. Emma is lying next to her mother and playing with a small piece of hair that has fallen from her bun. Santana opens one eye slowly and tickles her daughter's sides. The little girl bursts into a fit of giggles. "Mama st-ttopp!" Emma screeches as her mother continues her attack on the little girl. "Okay okay Mija, let's go see who is at the door" Santana says a little bit too excitedly, although she has an idea of who may knocking. Emma slides carefully off the bed and grabs her mother's hand as they walk to the door together.

Santana checks the peephole first and sees a tall blonde who could only be Brittany. A big smile appears on the Latina's face. She opens the door and offers Brittany the biggest most sincere smile. Brittany looks up to see Santana smiling and offers the same in return. She looks down towards the little girl who seems to have gone quiet and is looking wringing her hands, something Brittany does. She notices the little girl is much more nervous than she was a few hours ago in the diner. She bends down to get to her level "Hi Emma, it's so very nice to see you again, do you remember me, Brittany?" Emma nods her head slowly and furrows her brows as if she is thinking very carefully on what she should do. She looks up and offers Brittany a very shy smile, and then looks to her mother. Santana nods to her daughter signaling that everything is okay, she doesn't have to be afraid. "Hi Bwitty, tanks for coming ova, do you wanna play wif me?" Emma says and looks at Brittany with her big brown orbs. _Beautiful eyes like her mama she thinks to herself. _"I would love nothing more!" Brittany says enthusiastically.

Emma and Brittany are playing blocks and counting to ten together in front of the mantle. They've counted to ten so many times they could have been at 100 more than once. Santana is sitting on the couch with her glass of water watching the two of them play quietly together. It's then she notices Brittany is wearing her uniform from the diner and a very light jacket. It is February, Britt definitely should be wearing a heavier jacket this time of year, especially in New York City. It's ridiculously cold, Santana questions why she moved here when she hates to be cold. Oh right she remember now. She is snapped out of her daydream literally by Brittany. "What are you thinking about?" she asks suddenly. Santana's eyes involuntarily wonder over Brittany's clothing. Brittany's cheeks are immediately a rosy color and she looks down at her wringing hands. She shakes her head telling the Latina that she isn't ready to talk about it.

"Mama will you play wif me and Bwitty?" Emma asks suddenly pulling the two women out of their tense moment. They make their way over to Emma and help her to build her blocks and count to ten over and over again. A short while later Brittany looks at the clock and realizes it's close to 6 o'clock. She looks at the mother and daughter with a frown on her face now that she has to leave so soon. She was having so much fun and really wanted to get to know Santana better. Santana notices the frown on her face, "what's wrong Britt?" her heart flutters a little when she calls her that. "I have to get going San, I have to call a cab to come pick me up if I want to be back by 6." "Oh well I can give you a ride back let me just get Emma's jacket, hat and gloves and we can go, I don't mind taking a ride" Santana says. Brittany looks down again and shakes her head no, she doesn't want Santana to see where she is living right now, and that would definitely scare the woman away. Santana shakes her head as well, "I'm driving you Britt, please, and I don't want you traveling alone on public transportation. I invited you here the nice thing to do would be to drive you home, even if I don't really want you to leave yet" She says quickly. "I'm sorry Santana but I can't let you see where I live right now, you won't want to hangout with me anymore" The tears are welling up in Brittany's eyes as she struggles to get out the words. She doesn't want to hurt Santana's feelings but she really just isn't ready for this right now.

Defensive Santana comes out to play obviously thinking, well knowing, that Brittany is hiding something from her. "Why not? I mean is this your way of just getting rid of us? You don't want to me to see that you're married or something and I'm just a random woman you laid with last night?!" She basically screams at the blonde, but when she sees the tears rolling now her face she recoils knowing that she struck a nerve with the girl. "That's not it San, there's several parts of my life that I am just now proud of and I don't want you of all people to look down on me because of the way I live, even if it's the only choice I have" She says through the tears that are now flowing heavily. "Brittany there is something about you, I never trust this easily with a person, there is nothing you could do that would make me think any less of you, I would just want to help you with whatever it is. I invited you into my home because there is a connection between us, we may have started off on the wrong foot but I would love nothing more than to fix that. Emma also really likes you and she is normally never this way with strangers, basically getting past my daughter is a difficult task and so far you are doing well. So please Britt tell me what's going on." She finishes strongly as she hesitantly reaches her hand out to grab Brittany's. They both feel the electricity but choose to ignore it right now.

_I guess I could fill her in on something, maybe after she realizes where I live she won't want to be friends anymore though, I really like her I don't want that to happen. Emma is adorable and I just can't have another person look at me like I'm a waste of space, Brittany thinks to herself before speaking. "_There's a lot I would have to tell you San, but let's start off with me giving you the address to where I am living right now and we'll go from there, if you don't want to hangout anymore after this I will completely understand, I'm not really worth it anyway" Santana shakes her head at the last statement, "Brittany you are more than worth it, please don't assume anything like that."

Santana picks up Emma and brings her daughter to her room to get her into warm enough clothing to head out into the bitter cold of NYC. Fifteen minutes later she immerges with Emma resting on her hip, a jacket, glove, and hat in hand for Brittany as well, she can't let the woman keep walking around in the freezing weather wearing just a light jacket. Brittany looks up at Santana giving her a shy smile as a thank you for giving her something to wear.

All three walk out to the elevator, once inside, Emma puts her arms out to Brittany asking her to hold the little latina. Brittany looks at Santana who nods that it's okay while passing the little girl over to the blonde. Emma smiles wide while wrapping her arms around Brittany and buries her head into the neck of the woman. Santana smiles wide at her daughter's actions and how easily the two have bonded already. She carefully reaches out her hand and tangles their pinkies together while giving a squeeze. The gesture assures Brittany that things are going to be okay, well she hopes.

Once out to the car Brittany straps Emma into the backseat and hops in the front with Santana. She punches the address into Santana's phone and they're on their way. Brittany is nervously wringing her hands in the front seat, Santana reaches over and clasps their hands together giving it another light squeeze. "It's okay Britt-Britt," she says with a wink. Brittany just nods.

"You have arrived at your destination 121 St. Vincent's Road" the GPS speaks loudly through the phone. Santana looks up and smiles at the little yellow house but quickly notices that it's 123 and notices the building next to it with a line of woman and children waiting outside. Her stomach drops when she realizes where she is and that Brittany had to be back at six to wait online for a bed. Brittany is living at a homeless shelter for women. She quickly glances at Brittany who again has tears in her eyes when she notices that Santana now knows she is homeless and living here. Santana is rendered speechless as she looks back and forth between the blonde and the shelter. Brittany takes this as a sign that Santana doesn't want to be around her and definitely won't allow her daughter around anymore. Although she has already grown to care about the brunettes she knows this is it. The tears are overflowing as she takes off the jacket and accessories and starts to exit the car. She wipes her face roughly, doesn't want anyone else to see her as weak, and waits in line for her bed for tonight.

Santana is still stunned and hasn't realized that Brittany has left the car and left the warmth that she provided her with. Once she realizes that Brittany has left the car thinking that she disgusts her or that she isn't worth it anymore, she throws the car in drive and finds the nearest spot. She quickly moves to the back seat and grabs Emma out. She runs over to where Brittany is sitting on the floor shivering in her tiny uniform with no jacket and waiting for a sleep spot. Santana bends down and places her left hand on Brittany's knee while still holding her daughter. The blonde looks up at her with fresh tear tracks, swollen eyes and cheeks. Santana's breath catches in her throat and tears well up in her eyes. She reaches out her hand for Brittany to take, the blonde is hesitant at first, eyeing the brunette suspiciously. She eventually grabs her hand and allows the Latina to pull her up and into a hug. It's the first real intimate contact since cuddling the night before. "Lets get back in the car Britt, you can explain if you want, or we can talk later, but I am not leaving you here." Santana says looking at the blonde with tears slowly falling from her eyes. Brittany nods and reaches up to wipe the tear away with her thumb. Emma again reaches out for Brittany, who gladly takes the little girl in her arms and holds her close.

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Santana, Brittany and Emma return to the apartment. Brittany is carrying Emma and goes to lay on the couch with the little brunette, no one has said anything since leaving the shelter. Emma curls into Brittany's side who instinctively wraps her arm around the little girl. Santana grabs a blanket and drapes it over the girls while she goes to make something for dinner. A half hour later she comes out to see them in the same position but this time they are both sleeping.

Santana kisses her daughter lightly on the head as she flutters her eyes open and smiles at her mother. She then moves a piece of Brittany's hair that has fallen over her face and kisses her forehead gently. Brittany scrunches her eyebrows at the feeling and opens her eyes quickly. Her eyes are wide and she's confused as if she can't remember where she is. Emma must sense her dilemma and grabs her cheeks lightly to pinch her lips together giving her a kiss, the same way she does to her mother. _I guess my little girl has taken quite a liking to this beautiful blonde lying on my couch, maybe she's breaking out of her shell at little bit. _Santana thinks to herself.

"Britt, are you hungry? I made some pasta for dinner" Santana says to the blonde who still has a deer in headlights look on her face. She nods and hands the little brunette to her mother. Once they are settled, Santana sets the table and places Emma in her highchair. "Britt do you want to tell me what's going on? Like I said I am not going to judge you, I'm sorry I reacted poorly before I was just surprised" She chuckles awkwardly, this isn't the first time Brittany left her dumbstruck. She looks up at the blonde who is looking down and wringing her wrists, she gently reaches over and takes the blonde's hair in her own. "I was seventeen when I realized I was different and that I loved people no matter if they were a boy or girl, I was dating a boy, Artie, when I was a junior in high school, my parents were convinced I was going to marry him. At one point I believed that I would marry him as well, I thought I was in love with him. Everyone always thought that I was stupid because I had a different way of thinking, my parents always called me a blonde bimbo, or ditzy, or an idiot. Artie never called me stupid he always made me feel like the smartest person in the room" Brittany says softly, as Santana squeezes her hand softly to encourage her to continue. "The summer going into Senior year I told Artie that I liked girls the same way I liked guys, he called me stupid in the middle of the hallway, ranting about how it was a sin and he could never marry someone with these disgusting thoughts" Santana cringes at her words. "I grew up in a small town in Kentucky where people who were different weren't accepted. Once my parents found out about me being different, they kicked me out. I never graduated high school and moved here with the little money that I had. The only job I could find at the time was at the diner, nobody wants to hire an idiot, but Mickey was different. The money isn't that great so I couldn't really afford rent. I was a really amazing dancer in high school and wanted to pursue a career, maybe even go to Julliard" she smiles sadly and looks down at her hands again. "I went to _Kitty's _when some of the women were talking about it at the shelter, I figured with my dance skills I would be able to make some money, it's been good so far and the tips are great, I just can't help but feel awful about myself and that it's dirty money I am getting" her lip trembles and I know she can't continue. Santana wraps her arms around Brittany's neck "you're going to stay here with me and Emma, we have the room and I will help you sort through it, there's something about you Brittany, I want to help."

After a quiet silence and just holding each other, Santana looks over at her daughter who has finished her pasta and is now playing with her cup and bowl stacking them on each other. Brittany moves suddenly "I don't want your pity Santana, I'm a dumb stripper who never even graduated, I don't deserve someone like you, I'm dirty and let people put their hands on me for money, you don't want anyone like me. I'm just not worth it." She rips herself away and begins to gather her small amount of belongings just like this morning. I grab her wrist and turn her towards me, "Please don't tell me what I deserve, you are amazing and smart and great with Emma, I don't pity you I want to help you, please let me help you, please" Santana says with tears in her eyes. Brittany sends her a shy smile through her own tears pulling Santana close. They lock eyes and Brittany leans down to kiss Santana, just as she is close enough Santana backs away with wide eyes and a terrified look on her face. _Oh God Brittany thinks, I read this all wrong, she just wants to be my friend, she's disgusted by me, what was I thinking who the fuck would want me romantically? I'm a disgusting human being, how does Santana even let me in her home and near her daughter?_ Santana can practically see the wheels spinning in Brittany's mind and knows exactly what she is thinking.

"No, no, no! Brittany it is not what you think at all! I am definitely a lesbian you didn't read this wrong at all, _can she read my mind or something? _It's just…. we all have secrets Britt, I haven't kissed anyone in years, hell I haven't been romantically involved with anyone in 5 years" Santana rushes out and Brittany raises her eyebrow at the Latina.

"I was raped Brittany, I was raped almost 4 years ago."

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Please Review! Thank you : ) I do not own glee, just borrowing the characters!


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